I used to be extremely introverted. I didn’t speak. Like, ever. So…crushes…were interesting. I never talked to guys. Plus, my parents were totes strict, so I didn’t really associate with guys until I was in middle school. I was socially awkward…when it came to cute guys. Only cute guys. (teehee) And, OMG! I was so into the white guys. Like, blue-eyed, blonde (sometimes), white guys. I was boy crazy back in middle school.

Hmmm…where was this story going? Oh, right. The first time I was rejected. I figured, since I’m reliving painfully embarrassing memories from the past, might as well dredge this one up.

I was taking a class at a technical college a little bit after high school, and this guy, let’s call him Joe, took the same class as me. It was a bullshit class, though. (But didn’t I do alotta bullshit back in the day?) I was convinced that he took the class because I was in it. (See, this is where my narcissism comes into play.) And we’d been talking (AOL instant messages count) for a while. I was kinda feeling him. (Ugh! I kinda hate that expression. “Feeling” someone.)

So, anyways, we went out to lunch a couple times. One time, we went to this teriyaki joint. We had just finished our meal and we got in the car to go back to school, but my stupid car wouldn’t start. The most embarrassing thing ever in life. (Ugh! Was I always this dramatic?) I knew nothing about cars. And neither did he! (What?! I thought dudes were supposed to know about all kinds of macho guy stuff, like cars!?) Well, I had to call my mom cauze I really had no idea what to do. And as soon as my mom got there, she called my uncle (he’s a really good mechanic) and he was trying to diagnose the problem over the phone. (He did, btw. But in the end my mom still paid $100+ to have some guy tell her the same thing my uncle told her.) At one point, he told my mother to “jiggle” something. She couldn’t reach it, so she went in her trunk and took out a freaking bat and she proceeded to “jiggle” something under the car. WTH!? And there were other things she was doing to the car. I was mortified. Joe had to call someone to take him back to school so he can get his car. It was crap.

But even after classes ended, we still talked. (Yes, on AIM!) We both love anime, and so we borrowed each others’ anime DVDs. And he even came over so we could watch this one anime together that he kept raving about. He kept saying how it’s good and it’s kind of like a love story. It started out as one of those typical, cute, romantic animes; boy meets girl, girl asks boy out, boy reluctantly says yes, boy starts to fall in love with girl, and then it turns out the girl is a weapon of mass destruction. Nice. It was like a romantic-action anime. Only in Japan, yo!

So, obviously I’d developed quite a crush. And am I wrong in assuming that he felt the same? Maybe. How the hell should I know? I’ve never dealt with guys and their feelings and all that dumb stuff before.

We started texting. (Which was like, the next step up from IMing…ok?) I was pretty content with how things were. I didn’t really feel like I needed more. But, OMG! A friend of mine thought it would be helpful to boost my ego and feed me lies! (Ok, I’m sure he didn’t believe they were lies…) “He’s totally into you!” “OMG! He likes you!” “You should just ask him out!” “You guys would look so cute together!” Blah, blah, blah!

So, I told Joe how I felt. (In a text message, OK!?! Stop judging me!!!) He gave me the whole, “I only think of you as a friend” speech. Shit.

It sucked. I’d never been rejected before! Of course, I had never put my feelings out on the line like that before. Ever. But it still sucked. I was sad. And I was like…wth?! And then it was over. No hard feelings. We were both pretty honest about it. We stayed friends for a while after that. But even with all the MySpace, the Facebook, the Twitter, and every other social media outlets out there, we lost touch. It’s funny how that goes.

But, damn, guys. My mother straight up pulled out a freaking baseball bat out of her trunk. None of my brothers play baseball. What the hell was she doing with a baseball bat in her trunk!? Seriously.

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